Answer me
by LittleMissAfflicted
Summary: "I remember when that look of yours was real, Sebastian. Hungry. Hungry for an innocent little boy who didn't know what he was getting himself into." Because until he sees the hatred, Ciel won't be satisfied. Spoilers. Sebastian/Ciel. Dark. Yaoi.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer:** Any characters in Kuroshitsuji belong to Yana Toboso. I'm jealous.

**Warning: Spoilers! **Murder in the first chapter. A lemon will probably be coming up as well. If any of that bothers you, just walk away. Unicorns and lollipops are still within reach. =D

**AN:** After writing so much fluff, I decided to try something a little darker. In my mind, I picture demon-Ciel as a being who is very opposite from what he was as a child. Maybe that's just me, though XD

* * *

"She was quite tasty."

Sebastian watched the scene before him with narrowed eyes and an obedient silence.

"She was pretty, too. Do you think her parents will miss her, Sebastian?" Ciel's voice was soft and saturated with amusement, "She was such a bother though. So whiny. Girls are the easiest to grab hold of, but I don't like putting up with them, Sebastian. Make sure you get me a male next time. Or maybe a mute female, so I don't have to hear all that useless screaming."

Sebastian's reply was automatic, "Yes, my Lord."

"Good."

The Earl turned demon sat in a bed, the lifeless form of a young woman draped across his lap. She had been such easy prey, with a heart that was kind, but filled with unearthed jealousy. A quick contract with a demon was enough to bring her dark and petty desires to light, and once she'd gotten her dearest wish, Ciel had held her head between his pale, delicate hands, stolen her first kiss, and with it, her tainted soul.

The scene Sebastian watched unfold was something he'd quickly grown used to. Ciel, now a newly born demon, had a very healthy appetite that did not take long to make itself known. This girl was the third person within a single week whose soul Ciel had devoured. With every soul the little demon consumed, he seemed to grow further away from who he had once been, and closer to what he now was.

"Sebastian" Ciel looked up at his butler, his eyes a telltale blood-red, "come. Take me home now. Her body's gone cold, and I'm sure her family will be home soon. I don't want to be around to hear their pitiful cries."

Sebastian retrieved his master, watching the girl's body fall limply, as if she had always been an overgrown doll. He cradled the boy in his arms, something that had always been amusing. When Ciel had been human, that is. Now it only served as a reminder of what he had lost, and the personal hell that he would be forced to live through for all of eternity.

Ciel looked up at him, his eyes glazing over to that false shade of sapphire blue that had once been legitimate, and sighed lazily. "I want a bath too, when we get home, Sebastian. Perhaps if she hadn't squirmed so much," he placed a bloodied finger in his mouth and suckled it lazily, "I wouldn't have had to soil myself so."

"Yes, my Lord."

Sebastian leapt out of the window of the room, cradling his misery in his own arms.

A breeze floated through the window, splaying the young woman's ebony hair behind her head, making her pale yellow nightgown flutter and then settle over her chilled body. Her pale blue eyes were wide and empty, a dead hand reaching towards the clean, deep slit that adorned her throat. That night, a mother, a father, and a younger brother would pierce the silence of their home with screams of horror and agony.

* * *

One of the few things that Ciel was retaining was his affinity for living in the lap of luxury. Although he had relinquished his mansion, his fortune, and his title, he remained fond of lavish goods, and of being maintained. He had decided to have a new mansion built by Sebastian, so that he could have somewhere to dwell while he waited in between one meal and the next.

There had been a time when Ciel found everything Sebastian did for him to be a little embarrassing, and tiresome. Now he took pleasure in watching the frowns flit across Sebastian's face when he dressed him, the grimaces when he was forced to seek a new soul for him, and the look of hopelessness he got whenever he made his eyes go that rich, demonic ultraviolet.

So as Ciel sat in his bathtub, watching Sebastian's mechanic movements as soap suds were scrubbed onto his body, he let out a high, pealing laugh of pure indulgence.

"Oh, Sebastian," he chuckled, raising an arm for Sebastian to scrub beneath, "I truly love it, you know."

"I beg your pardon, my Lord. I don't understand what you-"

"Don't play coy with me, Sebastian. Your hatred for me is so obvious that it might as well be carved onto your face." Ciel turned to face the butler, the water in the tub sloshing around his body gently. The smaller demon brought his fingers up to Sebastian's face, tracing the line of his jaw and caressing his lips with his thumb.

"What a piece of work. Was that really all it took to break you? Getting rid of my soul? Was something so pointless really the only thing that tethered you to me, Sebastian? Answer me. And you know the answer I want."

"Yes, my Lord."

Ciel's fingers ran along the side of Sebastian's face until they found purchase in his midnight hair, his grasp gentle and teasing for mere seconds before his hold on the strands became rough, nearly painful.

"_Pathetic_," the demon-child hissed, his eyes that cruel red once more, "the look in your eyes is so pathetic Sebastian. If you're going to hate me, let that hatred reach your eyes. But do not mock me by drowning yourself in your denial. It _sickens_ me."

Sebastian did not know how to comply with his master's desire. What he felt was not hatred, but loss. A selfish loss for the pure and beautiful soul that would never be his. His, or anyone else's.

Ciel let his hands fall from Sebastian's locks, only to begin slipping them along the moonlight-pale skin of his neck. "I remember when that look of yours was real, Sebastian. _Hungry_. Hungry for an innocent little boy who didn't know what he was getting himself into. Your eyes would flash that ridiculous violet, just for a second, and oh, but it would bring such a flush to my cheeks. A handsome thing like you, coveting me. But then I'd remember what you were, and what you were for, and I'd feel so _disgusted_. At you. At myself. Isn't that funny?"

Sebastian stayed very still as Ciel's nails, blacker than crow's feathers, were dragged along his throat, barely a whisper. They stopped beneath his chin, tipping his head back only slightly, and Ciel laughed another chilling laugh.

"Answer me, Sebastian. Answer me the way you know you want to."

"I was never once attracted to your-"

"I said to answer, not lie!," the boy grit through his sharp, perfect teeth.

"You sad, sick excuse for a demon. That you weren't attracted to my body? The one that housed the soul you'd nearly died for time after time? Only a brute would believe it! Can you truly say that the thought never excited you? That you never wondered what it would be like to be the first to taint something so pure?"

Ciel drew closer to his butler, letting a cynical smirk graze his ear.

"I would have given in to you, I think. If you'd tried, I would have let those foul hands of yours touch everywhere, until I was begging, like all those dirty whores you let yourself slip into. How many of them did you bed before meeting me? Ten? Twenty? Mm," the look on Ciel's face grew pensive, "knowing you, probably hundreds. But how many were as sweet as I was? How many had a soul that drove you mad, the way mine did, Sebastian? Devouring my soul was your goal, but tainting the body it belonged to was a temptation in and of itself, wasn't it."

Ciel sounded sure of himself. With good reason, Sebastian thought, for the words he was saying were true. True, but pointless, for the things he spoke of no longer existed. Ciel's soul was no longer there. What sat before him in this tub full of lukewarm water was, and would only ever be, a demon.

"That desire" Ciel murmured, embracing Sebastian with his small limbs, his wet body soaking an otherwise immaculate uniform, "is gone now, isn't it. If you did it now, it wouldn't be the same, would it. It would only pain you and make you suffer even more than you already have, wouldn't it, Sebastian. Answer me. The answer I love the most."

It was reluctant, but delivered nonetheless, "Yes, my Lord."

A pair of small lips pressed against Sebastian's jugular, where any human would have had a healthy, resonant pulse. Ciel's eyes grew from muddy red to the unnatural ultraviolet that Sebastian knew so well.

"This is an order, Sebastian," he whispered, voice like velvet, "you will do it. You will give me pleasure like no one else ever has, or indeed, ever will. And while you do, you'll let me see that hatred burn in your eyes, until all of my body feels it. Have I made myself clear? Now answer me. The only thing I ever want to hear leave those repulsive lips of yours."

"Yes, my Lord."

* * *

A cliffhanger? I _**hate**_ them, myself. Really, I do! But I don't have any plans to leave this hanging, so bear with it, and let me know what you thought! ;P


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer:** I don't own 'em, Yana Toboso does, and that is probably for the good of mankind

**Warning:** Yaoi. Really dark, twisted yaoi... ;_;

**AN:** I wrote it, but somehow, it makes _my_ skin crawl.

* * *

"Funny, how easy it is to shed clothes, when it is so time consuming to put them on, isn't it."

Ciel voiced his thought aloud as he stood bare before his butler, quietly undoing each button on his damp, collared shirt.

Something about the way his pitch-black nails contrasted with the pure white of the garment made him feel satisfaction. Black. White. Damnation. Purity. A demon who had danced across the pits of hell. A fledgling who had only just taken the first few steps of this atrocious waltz. His butler, Sebastian. Himself, Ciel.

He turned his hand over, running the smooth tops of his nails over Sebastian's pale chest.

"Such a perfect body, for something so wicked. Such beautiful faces we bear, for creatures so ugly," Ciel said, still in reverie, turning his hand over and pressing the pads of his fingers along Sebastian's flesh. It made the butler want to flinch. It felt like he was being seared with blades of the coldest ice.

"But of course, we have to be that way, don't we? Beauty, perfection… how easily it tempts a person's soul. How it captivates them. Makes them as rabbits that willingly settle in a hawk's nest, so long as they can have one glance at the majestic gold of his eyes. And the hawk will tear them, rip them, feast on them without a care as to how they came about. But the rabbits will have gotten to look at that molten color in the eyes of their killer, and somehow, that would be enough."

Ciel's hands rested on the hem of Sebastian's pants, and he dragged his fingers over the front, toying with the zipper and button.

"Were all those whores like that, Sebastian? It was alright that you tore them from the inside, so long as you made their bodies tremble? It was fine that you wouldn't even shed your gloves, so long as they got to press themselves against this body of yours? I bet you loved it. A whole nest of rabbits, lined up for you, each one more foolish and eager than the last."

"Maybe that's why," the sound of a zipper being undone resonated in the room, "you thought I was so precious. I didn't see a hawk. I saw a hideous black crow. I wouldn't have begged you. I wouldn't have wanted it. I wouldn't have been waiting for you in your nest. You would have had to sink talons into me, and drag me there yourself."

"They think they're all hawks, when they see me, Sebastian. They look at me with their greedy eyes, and I can see it. Feel their filthy thoughts. Watch them dream of turning me over like fresh prey, and debauching me completely. And when they can no longer resist it, they come close, too close, only to have their wings torn. Because the golden eyes of a hawk are nothing to the jade, preying eyes of a feline."

Sebastian looked at Ciel with an expressionless face, still as a statue, as he felt his trousers come undone and pool over his shoes and onto the moist floor.

Ciel laughed richly, "Cats are your favorite, right? You never did say why. Although I'm sure I can imagine. Was I like a cat to you? A kitten maybe? Did you like watching me grow just a little more wicked while still staying so adorably attractive?"

The red eyes were flooded by sapphire, and Ciel bit his lower lip, face pleasantly flushed, brows furrowed in mock frustration. "S-Sebastian…"

The butler's eyes shone violet for a mere moment, and Ciel's laughter filled the room.

"I saw it," he teased, "I saw that look. So it still drives you then. The way I… no. The way Ciel used to be."

"He was perfect."

"Well, he speaks! You'll have to excuse me for being less than perfection then, Sebastian. You want to know something about that lost soul?"

"I'm certain you'll tell me, my Lord."

The little demon was embracing him now, cheek pressed to his chest, those delicate limbs wrapped around his waste. His fingers were grazing his backside, tracing over the mounds of flesh over and over again, as if Ciel couldn't decide whether he wanted to caress him, or shred him apart.

"Cheeky bastard," Ciel sighed against him, "but despite that, I loved you. Or at least, my soul did. It hated what you were. Hated what you did. But in some twisted way that I'll never understand, my soul needed you. And you failed to keep it intact. But no matter."

"My body is still mine, Sebastian. My body is still _whole_, Sebastian. Will you wait until I find a hawk with feathers lovely enough to bait me? Or will you do as a feline does, and pin me down, and mark me as yours? It's all you can do. The only thing that Ciel left behind."

Sebastian's head was being cradled by those petite fingers, and as he looked down at those impossibly blue eyes, an illusion of what once was, he grew furious. The ultraviolet in his gaze was fierce and relentless.

"That's it then," Ciel cooed, "isn't it. What is it you want, Sebastian?"

"I _wanted_ Ciel, my Lord."

"Then in one way or another, I'll give him to you. This is an order, you pitiful thing. Take me to my bed, and do what you should have done then."

"I should have had your soul, and killed you."

"Well, you can still try the latter, fruitless as it'd be. But don't get so greedy. Just take this little kitten to your nest, you stupid crow, and fold those tainted wings about it's body. Your answer, Sebastian, the one you're beginning to feel right _here_."

Ciel's little fingers were wrapped about his length, and Sebastian growled what he knew he had to, "Yes, my Lord."

* * *

"My, Sebastian," Ciel smirked, "I can see why women were so taken with you. To think a crow could have such a wicked tongue."

Sebastian and Ciel lay on a rather large bed, a four poster with a sheer black veil encasing the whole of it. Inky feathers that sheltered the nest of a crow and his catch.

Both now completely nude, Sebastian sat cross-legged with Ciel in his lap, worrying at the moist flesh of the little demon's neck, running his tongue over the lines of his veins. He stopped suddenly, pressing his lips to where neck became shoulder, and pierced the skin with razor-sharp fangs.

Ciel whimpered, tilting his head back as he allowed Sebastian to drink the fresh blood that spilled from the wound.

"I bet it tastes like poison."

"Worse," Sebastian replied, licking away the bright red, "but your body tastes the way he might have."

"Shut up, Sebastian! Don't say such dirty things!"

Ciel was looking down at him, blue irises averted with the false act of shyness.

"Don't imitate him. It's a waste of time," Sebastian snarled, one of his hands running along Ciel's smaller chest, over skin pale and lovely as a lily, stopping to brutally pinch a rosy nipple.

"Sebastian," Ciel moaned softly, "s-stop that. Your hurting me…"

"I told you to stop," the butler was pinching hard enough that anyone normal would have been wailing. Anyone human.

Ciel arched his back, mewling with delight, "That's it. Let me feel _that_, Sebastian. Your hatred is amazing. So raw. It's _delicious_…"

Then he was back into his little act, crying out, "Ah! Se-Sebastian. That hurts! D-Don't! It… ahhh, _yes_!"

Sebastian was ravaging the other nipple with his teeth, the one he was pinching being thumbed hard, as if continuing to do so would wear the flesh away. There was a ball of fury somewhere inside him, and Ciel's little hisses were only fueling it. Making it grow like wildfire.

Just when it felt like he couldn't control himself any longer, he felt those sinister little lips pressing on his own, fangs cutting into his bottom lip. He felt the heat of his blood as his tongue met with Ciel's, the taste of both Ciel's blood and his own making a nauseating cocktail in his mouth.

"I can _taste_ it too," Ciel said in wonder, "you're boiling inside, Sebastian. More than I thought. But it's your fault. If you'd fought harder, maybe it'd be Ciel Phantomhive beneath you right now. Begging for you to touch more gently. To give him more. But that isn't me, Sebastian. I don't want that tenderness. Do you know what I want?"

"Should I care?" Sebastian spat, arching without thought as he felt two little hands gripping his cock.

"I suppose not" Ciel giggled, tightening his grip as he stroked. "Although you seem to be warming up to me. That's a dear. Give in a little. Show me how much you wanted me back then."

Sebastian was growling in the back of his throat as Ciel got up, indicating for him to kneel on his knees. That once angelic little face was crouched in front of him, not the least bit hesitant when placing the head of his length into its mouth.

"Mmm," Ciel moaned, chuckling around him, and whether or not Sebastian wanted it to, it felt good. Because it was still Ciel's cherubic little face that was doing it, and the image was too concupiscent, to _real_, to ignore.

"Sebastian" the boy purred, grinning, before dipping his head until Sebastian was touching the back of his throat. He hummed again, and the butler couldn't hold back a groan.

His little hands were still stroking, and his tongue was lapping against head, the tip of it piercing the slit as if trying to worm itself inside. Such brutal, unwanted ecstasy…

"Wet already," Ciel pressed a finger to the clear liquid at the top, and sucked it between his lips. "That taste is amazing," he moaned, and smeared his fingers with it again, gliding them over his chest, drawing haphazard lines that gleamed on his skin.

He threw himself against the pillows, splaying his legs in a display lewd beyond imagination, and stroked himself with two fingers, cackling.

"Sebastian," his voice was sickly sweet, "touch it, please? I bet I taste like all that tea you drown me in every morning. Wouldn't that be priceless…"

The thought drove Sebastian into a frenzy. Ciel, _his_ Ciel, probably _would_ have tasted like tea. Like Earl Grey, and new desire, and hesitance, and despair, and a love that would never leave his lips.

This was torture.

"That is so _lovely_," Ciel panted, his eyes a royal purple, as he could no longer keep control between his shade of blue and the red that wanted to swallow it. Sebastian had the little wretch in is mouth, now, dragging his teeth very, very carefully over the skin of the smaller length. When he reached the deep rose of the tip, he put it between his teeth and nipped, tugged, and it made Ciel's head toss back and forth.

"Ooh, but you are a horror. You'd all but tear it off, if you could, hm? That's evil, Sebastian. Especially when that mouth of yours is such a wonder." His back arched as he was sucked, hard, as though doing so would bring his soul out of that little opening. As if he had a soul.

"Ahh! _Sebastian_," Sebastian had plunged dry fingers into Ciel's entrance, with only intentions of pain. The hiss that flew out of Ciel's throat was tentative, and that was enough to put the signature smirk, long forgotten, back onto Sebastian's face.

Ciel swallowed, panting, until he realized that the pain was minimal, the stretching soothed by his inhuman ability to heal so quickly. The discomfort bled into pleasure, and Ciel became determined to have this the way he would have if his soul was still with him.

He shut his eyes, willing his irises to become that gorgeous sapphire blue, and let his lip quiver with the uncertainty that his human self would have had.

"Slowly, Sebastian," he whispered, his voice sounding as if he might cry, "that hurts… just a little more slowly, please?"

Maybe it was the way he had begged. Or the familiar blue. Or that face, that face that looked so real, as though his soul was still there, buried where he couldn't see it…

But Sebastian gave in.

He slowed his movement, plunging slowly and deeply, feeling something like want when Ciel moaned deeply, "That feels very good…"

"I hate you," was Sebastian's answering sigh, "and I'll never be able to say it enough."

"That's okay," dark lashes fluttered at him, closing, resting like butterfly wings on a blushing cheek, "I hate you too, you wretch. For hating me. For wanting me so much that you lost me. Let me lose myself. I'm tiring of this. Turn me over and claim me already, Sebastian."

"No." Sebastian said as he withdrew, laying beside Ciel, and facing him with fire in his crimson eyes. "If you want it, then ask it of me. Not the way Ciel would. The way you want to. The way demons beg."

Ciel's eyes went wide, the sapphire being swept away by ruby, and he looked at his butler silently, reaching out to touch his cheek. He smiled sweetly.

"Fuck me, Sebastian."

And the words awoke something feral, something that made Sebastian take hold of lithe hips and sink them down onto himself, until Ciel was sheathing him inside as deep as he could go.

Ciel sat still for a moment, shivering, squeezing his muscles around the thick heat that was plunged into his body. So this was what humans liked so much, was it? This intense heat, and this loss of control, and this faint feel of rapture…

It was heaven.

This must be why people loved rolling in sin. Because sin felt like heaven:

So fucking good that there was no reason not to want more of it.

Sebastian smirked, looking up at his master, who began to grin with equal appraisal. They moaned together as Ciel rocked his hips, pressing his hands onto a heaving chest.

"T-This is…" Ciel gasped, expression twisted as he began to bounce up and down, sending that scorch in deeper, and yet never deep enough.

"This is my hatred," Sebastian chuckled darkly, letting his hips follow Ciel's rhythm. "This is me tearing the only thing you had left apart. And now there is nothing left to make you ever look like who you once were."

"Mmm, that's perfect," Ciel groaned as he ground himself onto Sebastian, arousal pressing against the muscle of a flawless stomach, "is it- _ahhh_- how you thought it might be? If you… oh, there, _there_, Sebastian… if it, had been him?"

Sebastian growled at the inquiry, "Not even close."

"But better than those loosened whores, I'm sure," Ciel purred, letting all but the very tip of Sebastian slide out before he swept his hips back down in one fluid movement, taking him back inside.

"Yes… much better," Sebastian sighed as he gripped Ciel's pale hips impatiently, moving them to his liking, which was faster, harder, until Ciel let out a pleased little sob.

"Much better, and also the very worst of all. I detest you, my Lord."

"Then detest me a little harder," Ciel whined, his hips moving frantically. He was close, and the feel of it was driving him insane.

"With pleasure."

Sebastian pulled out of Ciel, who hissed loudly, his small body being splayed on all fours. Sebastian plunged in again, not careful in the least, and the sound of flesh on flesh filled the room.

"I hate you," Sebastian snarled into Ciel's ear, and the little demon arched his back and pressed his backside against him, mewling his delight.

"Again. I'll never tire of hearing you say it. Because it's- _yes, ah!-_ it's _your own damned fault._"

"I hate you."

"Mmmn!"

"I hate you."

Hips moved brutaly, Ciel's ebony nails tearing the bed sheets apart. "Sebastian!" A hand reached for his bobbing arousal and rubbed at the head.

"_**I hate you**_."

And that was the last push that Ciel sought. He felt, truly _felt_ their mutual abhorrence cut through him, and paired with that angled thrust that pressed against him so knowingly, he was gone. Crying out and squirming like the animal he now was, passion and hatred spilling all over the bed.

He felt that hatred and lust fill him inside, trickle over his thighs, heard Sebastian's guttural moan, and let a tired smirk flick across his perfect lips. And it was over.

They lay there in their world of black, their crow's nest, Sebastian's loathing nursed to Ciel's panting chest. Right over the spot where his heart would have been.

"Sebastian," Ciel said quietly, stroking fine, dark raven strands of hair, "do you know what cats, even kittens, do with their prey?"

Sebastian closed his eyes. "I do."

"Yes," a strand of black wove around a pale finger, "they play with it. They sit there and bat it around, wound after wound, and sometimes they don't even eat it. Sometimes they just sit there, and watch it… watch it as it slowly withers away."

"It is a cruel thing."

"A cruel thing that you brought upon yourself. I'm going to keep wounding you, Sebastian. And you will do the same to me, no doubt. But what shall be even more cruel, is that no matter how many wounds we give one another, we will never perish. I'll never stop hurting you. We'll never stop hating one another, so long as I wear this face, isn't that right?"

Two pairs of ruby eyes looked at one another.

"Answer me. And let me feel it."

"Yes, my Lord."

* * *

**Edit: **Goodness, you people. THANK YOU. Just, thank you, dammit! Your reviews made me go (o_o) and slide off of my chair... really... slowly... I'm having my own little heart attack. And guess what. I love it.


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